Glitch: A Beautiful Something

My name is Cheesefish, and against all logic it is one of the more mundane names I have come across.  I am wearing a sari and I have a fox on my head.  My hobby: squeezing chickens.  My mission: to become the finest chef the world of Glitch has ever seen.

Glitch is a browser-based, entirely combat-free, massively multiplayer online game. And for the last few days, it has been something of an obsession. It is Maple Story, if Maple Story cut the combat (and the Korean-ness) and focussed solely on exploration and crafting mechanics. And it’s the exploration that makes it. As a 2D scrolling flash game, there are none of World of Warcraft or Guild Wars’ sweeping vistas here, but it makes up for it in variety. One moment you may be exploring a lush and utterly normal forest, but one stop on the ever-present intercontinental subway drops you off in a land of pastel where the hills have eyes.

Stranger places still await the intrepid explorer. Keita Takahashi, creator of Katamari Damacy, has had his hands on this game and it certainly shows. (The other more recognisable members of the team are, bizarrely, the founders of Flickr.) There have clearly been some… unique minds behind the design of this game, which become most apparent when acquiring raw materials from the environment.

Need meat? You get it by nibbling on pigs, but only after petting them. Milk? From butterflies of course, but they must be massaged first. Grain can be obtained by squeezing chickens, but eggs? Oh, right. Egg plants.

From the odd interactions with fauna to the bizarre contraptions you can use, the ever-humorous quest descriptions and the pet rock that does your learning for you, there’s a strange sense of humour at work here and it works very well indeed.

Glitch is also an example of one of my most hated things – an Energy-based game that has no end. But here, it doesn’t feel malicious like the game-killing ‘games’ of Zynga and Playfish. Energy is plentiful and refills completely every few hours, and even with my character’s mediocre cooking skills, she can easily whip up enough odd food and drinks to keep her energy and mood full. Skills are learned over minutes, hours or days of real time, but again unlike FarmVille and its kin, they’re not just a mechanism to drag you back to the game. There doesn’t feel like an urgency to get them learned, and besides, you can manage them from the website or the iOS app without having to touch the game itself.

So what the heck is Glitch? It doesn’t seem much like a game, as there’s no way to win and no reason to compete against anyone. It’s a world to explore, to create and add to, and apparently, to hold farmers’ markets in.

It resembles nothing quite so much as a twenty-first century upgrade of the MUSH, the shared environments from the early ’90s. If it allows anything like a MUSH’s ability for players to create and expand the world, it will be a wonder. But creating with text is easy; doing so with graphics much more complex, and I can’t imagine the company behind Glitch giving up creative control so readily.

But even without that, even without an idea of what it is and what it’s going to be, it’s certainly a beautiful something.

Could I Live Without…?

A couple of months ago, I was particularly scathing about the crop of Facebook games that I was playing, particularly ones that had no end. The result? I no longer play any games on Facebook whatsoever. As I bemoaned at length, not one of them was adding to my life in any appreciable way.

I wonder if it is now a good time to apply the same logic to various online services — to be extremely critical of them, to discover whether or not they actually add any value to my life. In short, could I live without…

 

1. A Google Account

As a search engine, Google is almost essential to life on the internet today.  Like a lot of you, I have signed up to many Google services over the years, each one simply on the merit that it was better than the competition (if there even was competition).  I go through phases of being alarmed at the amount of data Google collates about us all — their “do no evil” policy is wearing thin in the eyes of their customers.  But could I manage without mail, calendars and contacts synchronised between my phone and the web?  Without the near-endless entertainment of Google Reader?  Without the Android Market?

Although I resent Google’s dominion over my online existence, its offerings are just better than others’.  And having an Android phone seals the deal.

Verdict: No.

 

2. GMail

If I can’t live without a Google account, maybe I should just dump the GMail part of it?  I’ve actually done this once before; moved my e-mail wholesale to my own server.  But I went back — it’s a nice feeling to be in charge, to have your own mail server, but everything was so much harder.  ”Archiving” and “tagging” become a multi-click ‘move’ operation, IMAP has a host of strange issues, and no webmail client is a patch on Google’s.

Ditching GMail appeals, but two months down the line I’d probably spend another evening moving everything back again.

Verdict: Probably not.

 

3. Twitter

I suspect I’m in the minority, in that I follow no celebrities and don’t use Twitter for anything to do with “brand awareness” or “customer interaction”.  I use it for talking to my friends.  There are simply too many of us, online too irregularly, to use instant messaging — or god forbid, phone calls — any more.  (Whether that says something about the quality of our interaction, I’m not sure.)  But without Twitter I’d be largely unaware of what’s going on in the lives of the dozen or so people I care about the most.  Though my posts may be trivial and of interest to few, losing Twitter would be close to losing friends.

Verdict: No.

 

4. Facebook

The social network we love to hate, there are a whole host of reasons people would want to quit — disregard for privacy, endless Farmville spam, lack of transparency / import & export functions — but yet, so few do.  I don’t play games on Facebook, I rarely post photos, I don’t “like” pages or take quizzes.  I have around 300 “friends”, many of whom I haven’t seen since school and wouldn’t recognise in the street.

But there’s a few close friends and family that don’t use Twitter, and closing my Facebook account would mean cutting them off.  And besides, there’s always that nagging thought: “you’re 26 years old, every 26-year-old is on Facebook!”

Verdict: It’s tempting to try.

 

5. Google+

Like many geeks, I am an “early adopter” of Google+, a social network that’s still in beta.  Now and again I load the page or run the mobile app, to see what people have posted — and they’ve posted exactly the same as they posted on Twitter.  Plus, without an API, I never bother to manually copy my own Twitter and Facebook posts to G+ too.

It’s nice to be in there in case it picks up and becomes the next Social Network to Rule them All.  But right now, it’s taking up brain power and space on my bookmarks toolbar, and I’m gaining nothing from it.

Verdict: Yes.

 

6. LiveJournal

All my LiveJournal posts are already syndicated from my blog, and I go through phases of disabling comments on my LJ posts to drag people to comment on the blog itself.  It rarely works, but I have so little interaction with people through LiveJournal these days that it barely matters.  LiveJournal is dying, at least from my perspective, and I have already declared it time to quit.  Perhaps now is the time.

Verdict: Yes.

 

7. DeviantArt

Once upon a time, I posted stories here with regularity.  Now, it’s a place I visit daily on the off-chance that one of the couple of artists whose pictures I enjoy has posted something.  Usually, they havent.  This is what RSS was made for.

Verdict: Yes.

 

8. Flickr

Though firmly an amateur, I’m proud of my photos and Flickr is where I choose to show them off.  It’s also where family members abroad go to see what we’re up to, and it’s my insurance against a hard disk crash erasing the bits and bytes of our memories.  Just as with GMail, there’s a strong temptation to move my pictures to my own server, and run my own image gallery — but Flickr just does it better.

Verdict: No.

 

9. Last.fm

I’ve been a keen scrobbler since the days when people knew what “scrobble” meant, and it’s so easy to set up that I’ve always set it up on any new computer, operating system or media player.  But why?  I know what my taste in music is, and I have little interest in my own listening history.  My friends surely have even less.  The only reason I can see for continuing is that I’m proud of the amount of data I’ve generated already — and that’s no reason at all for carrying on.

Verdict: Yes.

 

10. Foursquare

In using Foursquare, I may be just as much a victim of the sunk cost fallacy as I was in all those Facebook games.  I’ve now been “playing” for so long that I’ve stopped caring about beating my friends; stopped caring how far away the next wall-chart sticker might be.  Checking in is just something I do when I arrive at a place.  I’m now essentially getting nothing out of Foursquare, even though I’m still reliably giving the company and its affiliates a complete history of where I go and where I shop.

Verdict: Hell yes, ditch this yesterday.

 

What are your thoughts on my reasoning?  Which services are you tied to, and which are you considering leaving for good?  I’d be interested to know.

Announcing: Full Width Facebook Lite

Do I blog anything these days apart from new software? Oh well, here goes:

“Full Width Facebook Lite” is possibly the world's shortest Greasemonkey script: it simply removes the right-hand bar in the new Facebook Lite, thus removing the ad and the big white space, allowing the actual content to span the full width. Useful for people who don't like ads, and people with small displays!

To reiterate, this is for the new Lite version of Facebook that's currently in beta at http://lite.facebook.com. It has no effect on regular Facebook.

It requires Firefox with Greasemonkey, and probably works in anything else that supports the same kind of user scripts.

There's no point putting this under the GPL, it's so simple, so it's public domain. You can grab it using the links below.

Full Width Facebook Lite

This Greasemonkey script was for the Lite version of Facebook that was in Beta in 2009. Sadly, Facebook Lite is no longer available, meaning that this script is now redundant. However, if you’d like a quick and easy example of how to use GreaseMonkey to hide certain divs (e.g. for removing ads), check out the source code.

“Full Width Facebook Lite” is possibly the world's shortest Greasemonkey script: it simply removes the right-hand bar in the new Facebook Lite, thus removing the ad and the big white space, allowing the actual content to span the full width. Useful for people who don't like ads, and people with small displays!

It requires Firefox with Greasemonkey, Safari with GreaseKit, or similar. GreaseKit compatibility (via the in-built implementation of GM_addStyle) was provided thanks to 'greut' in this thread: http://userscripts.org/topics/1912. The auto-updater is provided by this script: http://userscripts.org/scripts/show/20145.

There's no point putting this under the GPL as it's so simple, so it's public domain.

Announcing: SuccessWhale!

For the last few days I've been working on a simple web-based Twitter client, to fill the void between the simplicity of Twitter's own web interface and the broken-in-IE6 complexity of BeTwittered and Seesmic Desktop's web interface.

It's still under heavy development, and there are probably a ton of bugs and missing useful features. Please give it a try and let me know what you think. Bug reports are more than welcome!

The source code is licenced under the GNU GPL v3.

Update: Due to a move to the proper OAuth API, the software could no longer continue to be called FailWhale, as someone's already written a Twitter app with that name! Thus, until I or someone else comes up with a good idea, it's called SuccessWhale.

SuccessWhale

SuccessWhale is a web-based Twitter and Facebook client written in PHP, MySQL and JavaScript. It’s a multi-column client that will work just the same in any browser – even IE6. (And as far as I know it’s unique in that respect.) You can also use it while on networks that block twitter.com. :) It’s free to use by anyone, has no advertising, and source code is available.

Visit SuccessWhale.com to try it out!

Features

  • You can add as many Twitter and Facebook accounts as you like, displaying data from each, and you can choose which to post to every time.
  • SuccessWhale has a multi-column view, which can be scrolled through if you want more than will sensibly fit on your screen. Many columns are available for each Twitter and Facebook account you register, including ones that combine notifications from all your accounts.
  • SuccessWhale is integrated with my Twitter pastebin, Twixt. Enter a reply longer than 140 characters into the box in SuccessWhale, and it will be shortened automatically using Twixt. SuccessWhale also displays the contents of Twixt posts inline, and expands short URLs.
  • You can use SuccessWhale from places where twitter.com and facebook.com are blocked. To do so, you’ll have to log in from a computer that can see the sites first, then click “Accounts” in the top-right and create yourself a SuccessWhale account. You’ll then be able to log in using that password from any computer.
  • You can maintain a “banned phrases” list, which will hide tweets containing certain phrases — great if you’ve got too many friends that spam their Foursquare check-ins to Twitter.

Screenshot

Successwhale 2 Screenshot

Successwhale 2 Screenshot (click for full size)

Status

SuccessWhale is complete, released software, and currently stands at version 2.0.1. It’s used by around 50 people — including myself — as their main Twitter and Facebook client, and a number of sites around the internet have used the source code to integrate SuccessWhale into their own sites. As far as I’m aware it has no bugs, but if you find any or would like to request any new features for the next version, you can contact me on Twitter (I’m @tsuki_chama), or via my contact form. If you’d like to submit bug reports and feature requests directly into my GitHub issue tracker, please register an account and do so.

Licence and Source Code

SuccessWhale is licenced under the GNU GPL v3. You can get the source code from GitHub here.

This includes all the third-party code on which SuccessWhale depends, including twitteroauth, the Facebook PHP SDK, jQuery, the jQuery Form Plugin, the jQuery BlockUI Plugin, the jQuery Impromptu Plugin, the jQuery Force Redraw Plugin, the jQuery breakly Plugin, the jQuery “put cursor at end” Plugin, and the PHP Simple HTML DOM Parser. (Certain parts of the SuccessWhale download are thus licenced under the MIT licence, which is more permissive than and compatible with the GPL licence that SuccessWhale itself uses.)

Installation

To run your own copy of SuccessWhale, check out the source from GitHub and load it on to a web server that supports PHP (v4 and above) and, optionally, MySQL (any version). Follow the instructions in INSTALL.TXT, which will include editing config.php to enter your own settings.

Then just navigate to index.php, follow the instructions on screen, and you should be up and running!

Development/Test Version

Version 2.1 of SuccessWhale will bring support for more services such as LinkedIn and Google+, along with addressing a number of more minor feature requests by users. Development is underway. You can try it out on the test server, and get the bleeding edge source if you want to play with it.

The test server will break frequently without warning, var_dump() stuff you don’t want the world to see, and may do weird unexpected things. If you ask for help or report a bug with it, I will probably be sarcastic at you.

Thanks to…

Premier League Fantasy Football Team Picker

For the 2011-2012 season, the Premier League Fantasy Football website has been changed to allow no access to the game stats without being logged in. This team picker will be offline until I find a work-around for this. Apologies for the inconvenience.

This script picks the optimum team for the Premier League’s Fantasy Football game, combining player stats with online injury lists. Useful so that people like me, who know nothing about football, have a chance! Note that it is only as good as the data it has access to, so it’s probably a bad idea to change your team according to its suggestions within the first few weeks of the season – wait until it has more data before trusting it.

It’s hosted here, and should run automatically every 24 hours. You can see the team it’s currently picking here:

Current Optimum Team

 

 

You can also get the source code from GitHub (provided under the terms of the GPL v3 licence)

Looking for my team picker for the Daily Telegraph game instead? It’s here.

Issues with this application are tracked on Github’s issue tracker. Please sign up and report any issues you find!

Twixt

Ever started replying to someone on Twitter, knowing as you did it that there's no way you could fit it all into 140 characters? Did it drag on into two, three, four tweets, cluttering up everyone's list? Twixt can help.

Having done just that several times, I was after a simple, disposable way of putting more than 140 characters up somewhere on the internet that I can link from a single tweet. Thus, I created this simple PHP script. Give it a block of text, and it'll generate you a unique web page and grab you an bit.ly short URL for it.

Visit twixt.successwhale.com to try it out!

API

Twixt also provides an API for use by applications such as my own SuccessWhale. To use it, simply provide it with a properly URLEncoded “tweet” argument, for example:

http://twixt.successwhale.com/index.php?tweet=Hello%20World!

Twixt will return the text-format output page of bit.ly's “shorten” API, which will be either an HTTP 200 OK containing the shortened URL, or an HTTP 500 Internal Server Error containing the error message.

Status

Twixt is mature, released software, and as far as I know there are no major bugs that affect it. If you find any bugs or would like to request any new features, please contact me via my contact form. If you’d like to submit bug reports and feature requests directly into my Mantis server, please register an account and do so.

Licence and Source Code

SuccessWhale is licenced under the GNU GPL v3. If you'd like to run this from your own website, you can get the source code from GitHub. To run it, you'll need a web server that can run PHP, and the directory the script sits in must be world-writable (chmod 777). To use the API mode, you’ll have to register with bit.ly to get a username and API key, then insert those at the top of Twixt’s index.php.

Gunboat

Gunboat is a slow-paced 2D shooter written in Java and JoGL. It is far from finished, but you can try out the current development version anyway. Issues with this application are tracked on my Mantis server, which is open to anyone to sign up, report bugs and request features. Please report any issues you find!

Downloads

Gunboat requires Java 1.6 and JoGL. Install Java as usual, and make sure the JoGL binaries (.dll files for Windows, .jnilib for Mac OS X, .so for Linux) are on the system path. (You can just put the libraries in the Gunboat directory if you like.)

Download Gunboat itself here, and unzip it anywhere you like. Run “java -jar dist/Gunboat.jar” to run the game. Gunboat.bat (Windows) or Gunboat.sh (Mac) will do this for you.

You can get the source code (and everything else) as a Netbeans project here on GitHub.

Online Version

I have done some work on an online browser-based version of Gunboat. (Requires Google Earth plugin.) However, it’s in its very early stages (you can’t shoot, there aren’t any enemies…). I’m not sure if I’ll continue with it – one on had, level design has suddenly become very easy! On the other hand, ick, Javascript. Source code for it is here on GitHub.

The rest of this page largely refers to the offline version, as it has many working gameplay components that the online version does not.

Gameplay

In Gunboat, you are a small ship tasked to defend your harbour against an attacking Navy. You can move freely around, and enemy ships will arrive in the harbour in waves. (Sometimes, allies will arrive to help you as well.) You must defeat all the enemies in each level to progress.

Your ship always appears at the bottom middle of your screen. Around it is a coloured ring, which represents your health. This will contract and change colour from green to red as you take damage. Attached to the right side of your ship is a British flag, representing your ship's alleigance. Allies may have other flags, and enemies will always have a different flag to yours. Every ship has both a flag and a health ring.

At the top of your screen is your HUD. On the left, your weapon loadout is displayed. The yellow reticle represents your currently-selected weapon, though you can have up to 5 in each slot. On the right, your speed, heading and radar are displayed. Speed and Heading are fairly self-explanatory. The radar has two modes that you can switch between. The default shows a map of the entire harbour, with other vessels appearing on it. Red are enemies, yellow allies, blue crates, and the green dot is you. The other radar mode, which you can toggle to at will, is a close-in radar. This only shows ships close to you, and thus gives higher detail. “Up” on this radar is in front of your ship, as opposed to the map view, where Up is always North.

Controls

The game is played with both keyboard and mouse. The controls are:

  • Move Mouse: Aim
  • Mouse Buttons: Fire Primary (Left) / Secondary (Right) Weapon
  • WSAD: Change speed / heading
  • Q: Switch primary weapons
  • E: Switch secondary weapons
  • R: Switch radar modes
  • C: Switch camera angles (Follow, Above, Bird's-Eye, Bridge)
  • H: Show/hide HUD (Might be useful on machines without 3D acceleration.)
  • N: Give yourself a Nuke (Cheat mode for testing only. Has no icon. Like a homing missile but faster, more agile, instakills, infinite ammo.)

Ship Types

  • Frigate (e.g. Type 23): This is the player's ship, although you will encounter this ship many times as both ally and enemy. It is fast and normally quite weak, and can carry a wide range of weapons. Yours has specially reinforced armour, so it has much more health than normal.
  • Marine Landing Craft: These tiny vessels are very fast, and sneak in close to their targets. Their machine-gun is weak, but left unchecked they can do considerable damage. They are easy to destroy.
  • MCMV (e.g. Sandown class): The Mine Countermeasure Vessel is frequently found accompanying larger fleets. It is weak and poorly-armed.
  • Destroyer (e.g. Daring class): These large vessels are tougher than frigates, and have multiple weapon mounting points. They usually have a combination of guns, torpedoes and anti-air weapons.
  • Aircraft Carrier (e.g. Invincible Class): Aircraft carriers are huge, heavily armoured and largely unarmed. Their strength lies in their ability to launch aircraft. A mixture of anti-air and anti-surface weapons is advised for taking out a carrier.
  • Landing Platform Dock (e.g. Albion class): Much like the carrier, the LPD's strength lies in the smaller vessels that it can launch – in this case, landing craft. It is also more heavily armed and armoured than a carrier.
  • Battleship (e.g. HMS Vanguard): Relics of a bygone age, these vast ships were designed to take on other battleships on the high seas. They are slow and unmanouverable, but have lots of armour and have lots of weapon mounting points. (These are boss-type enemies!)
  • Supply Ship: Supply ships are weak and unarmoured, and usually drop interesting pick-up items. Be warned, though, they usually come with a powerful escort!
  • Submarine: (e.g. Astute Class) Submarines lurk below the surface, attacking with torpedoes, anti-ship and anti-air missiles. Specific weapons are required to take out submarines, but they are lightly-armoured.
  • Helicopter (e.g. Lynx): The helicopter, a slow but manouverable aircraft, is generally used to drop depth charges.
  • VTOL Aircraft (e.g. Harrier): The VTOL (Vertical Take-Off and Landing) aircraft is fast and manouverable, and can launch anti-ship missiles, anti-air missiles and torpedoes. However, it has very limited ammunition.
  • Standard Aircraft (e.g. F35): These aircraft can only be launched from carriers. In addition to a limited supply of missiles, they also have a minigun. They are extremely fast, but not very maneuverabe.

Weapons

  • Vickers 4.5-inch Mark 8: The standard frigate deck gun, this weapon fires quickly and does a fair amount of damage.
  • Vickers .303 Machinegun: This tiny weapon does little damage and has a very limited range. It fires very quickly, but is extremely inaccurate. It can hit aerial targets as well as surface ones.
  • Twin QF 5.25-inch Mark 1: This is essentially the same as the 4.5-inch gun, except that there are two barrels per mounting point.
  • Twin BL 15-inch Mark 1: One of the highest-caliber naval guns ever put into service by the Royal Navy, this weapon fires slowly but over a long range, and the projectiles are extremely damaging. Not much survives a hit with two 15-inch rounds.
  • Naval Laser Prototype NDEW-1: This experimental direct-energy weapon fires rapidly, has a long range, and deals a lot of damage. However, over-use of this weapon will cause it to explode and damage your ship!
  • RGM-84 Harpoon Missile Launcher: This weapon, standard equipment for frigates, fires anti-ship missiles. They are slow, but turn in mid-flight to hit the nearest enemy ship. They deal extreme amounts of damage. This weapon has limited ammunition.
  • Tomahawk Missile Launcher: This weapon fires bigger and better missiles. They are faster, more manouverable, and cause more damage than their standard variant, but with even more limited ammunition.
  • Sea Wolf Missile Launcher: This is the anti-air equivalent of the standard anti-ship missile launcher. Its missiles move and home faster, to keep up with flying targets.
  • Naval Railgun EMG Mod 0: Though not particularly damaging and with an average fire rate, this weapon's strength is that it hits almost instantly, so there is no need to lead the target.
  • Standard Torpedoes: Torpedoes are slow and damaging, much like anti-ship missiles, except that they do not home on a target. Their strength is that they can hit submerged targets such as submarines as well as surface ships.
  • Sting Ray Homing Torpedoes: Homing torpedoes sacrifice some of their warhead space for their homing mechanism, and thus deal less damage.
  • Depth Charges: These weapons are dropped near your ship rather than fired, and they do not move. They only hit submerged targets – however, any submarine that gets lured onto the depth charge is instantly destroyed.
  • DS 30B 30mm Anti-Air Gun: This is the standard anti-air weapon. Much like the 4.5-inch gun, it fires quickly and deals moderate damage.
  • Flak Cannon: This weapon deals extreme damage to airborne enemies. However, its rate of fire is very low.
  • Phalanx CIWS: Not strictly a weapon, the Phalanx will not shoot at enemies. Rather, it is an automated turret that will shoot down any enemy missiles within a certain radius of your ship. It only lasts a limited time.
  • Shield Generator: An experimental device, the shield generator creates an electromagnetic force-field around your ship. It deflects all incoming projectiles, but it only lasts for a very limited time.

Other In-Game Items

  • Health Crate: Sometimes enemy ships will drop health crates when they're destroyed. Steer your ship over these crates (marked with a red H) to restore some of your health.
  • Weapon Crate: Enemy ships with interesting weapons may sometimes leave their weapon behind in a crate. (Supply ships drop random weapon crates.) Steer your ship over them to pick up the weapon, and add it as an option in either your primary or secondary slot.

Telegraph Fantasy Football Team Picker

This script picks the optimum team for the Daily Telegraph’s Fantasy Football game, combining TFF’s player stats with online injury lists. Useful so that people like me, who know nothing about football, have a chance! Note that it is only as good as the data it has access to, so it’s probably a bad idea to change your team according to its suggestions within the first few weeks of the season – wait until it has more data before trusting it.

It’s hosted here, and should run automatically every 24 hours. You can see the team it’s currently picking here:

Current Optimum Team

 

You can also get the source code from GitHub (provided under the terms of the GPL v3 licence)

Looking for my team picker for the Premier League game instead? It’s here.

Issues with this application are tracked on Github’s issue tracker. Please sign up and report any issues you find! (The old, offline version of the TFF team picker maintained its own change log, which can be found here.)


Jose Mourinho in “Not Really Superior to Robot After All” Shocker!

08-09 Fantasy Football results prove famous football dude not really all that much better at this than inanimate lump of silicon!